War Ina Babylon

Well, Georgie…how daya feel…got some egg on yer face now, don’tcha?  Finally had to call it quits and admit that no WMDs were found in Iraq after almost two years of scouring that dusty country from top to bottom.  All those Chicken Little cacklings about mushroom clouds and imminent threats to God-fearing, White, Christian-Americans were a bit short of the truth, weren’t they?  (Even though you trusted that Cheney and Rumsfeld and Wolfowitz and Tenent were God’s way of telling you to do His will in Iraq).  Turns out that nasty Saddam didn’t even have the capability of producing any biological, chemical, or nuclear WMDs after Pops kicked his ass in the Gulf War (and the UN inspectors kept him check). 

But it was all worth it, right?  FREEDOM IS ON THE MARCH!  A murderous, mad dictator has been vanquished!  (Never mind that Saddam was our ally during the almost decade-long Iran-Iraq war and Ronald Reagan supplied him with chemical weapons!)  You’ve given the Iraqi people the divine gift of DEMOCRACY.  All the billions of taxpayer dollars, the tens of thousands of Americans and Iraqis killed or wounded, and the complete destruction of a sovereign nation’s infrastructure were worth it, right?!  Who cares that we alienated our allies and have swelled the ranks of fundamentalist Islamic terrorists?  Who cares that we've trashed international law and the Geneva Convention in our "war on terror?"  We can torture and “disappear” anyone we damn well want to, right?!  We're righteous! Hell, we're gonna start up our own death squads in Iraq like we did in El Salvador to smack down the evildoers! Nobody else can tell us what to do now…we’re the ONLY GOD-DAMN SUPERPOWER and GOD IS ON OUR SIDE!  Right…? 

What?  Social Security is in imminent danger of failing and we need to borrow $2 trillion and dismantle the system to save it?!  Power on, O Great Leader!!! Clearly, you cannot fail!